Too eager


Abstract by OurDepression


I cannot contain myself

Years of neglecting patience

Has turned me into a foolish painter

I am seeking the instant thrill

The gratification that costs me nothing


I would like to be able to focus

A deliberate brushstroke escapes me

Rushing to get an outcome

I forget about the process

Containing myself feels impossible


Is it my illness that blocks my abilities?

Or have I simply forgotten how to concentrate?

Frustration grows quickly inside of me

And before long the soft bird I was creating

Becomes a frantic piece of abstract


I hope that one day I can relax

Lose myself in the art of making

Most I fear I will never calm down

Because of fear of not being aware of surroundings

Does my post trauma disallow me to cope?


I will not give up so easily

My next artwork will be different

Perhaps it will end up a smearing of colors again

But before that happens I will try hard

To put all of my effort into succeeding


Abstract by OurDepression


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s