Facade

The fine mahogany entrance

Might lead you to believe

That the halls are adorned with gold

 

I wish that I could destroy

All the ivory steps

 

The rooms are doused in alcohol

There’s matches in the drawers

Will I light the fire?

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When fear of the resting place looms

I am comforted that my mind returns to love

Love doesn’t die

I couldn’t write a beautiful last word

A poem for those that I love

If I tried

The verse would do no justice

To the experience of life and all that it is

How can love be portrayed with pretty letters

What unworthy things words are

To human emotion

Only if you read between the lines

Could you find the spirit that lies within me

And your memories, sweet memories

Are what would serve

As my voice and expression of heart

You know that I believe in love and kindness

The beating in my chest is deep for you

And though I am fractured

My soul is what you recognize behind

The changes I’ve gone through in my mind

Be happy, have joy and peace in life

Take care of each other

And know that if you pray

I will always be there listening to you

I will see all of you again

–Note– This isn’t a suicide note or anything. I’m just having a lot of delusions about dying in my sleep tonight after pushing myself too hard over the past couple days. I know that I will probably see tomorrow, but the irrational part of me says I need to leave a message for my loved ones in case I don’t wake up.

Threshold

I’ve reached beyond my threshold

And brought myself to a place

That I have not visited in a long time

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“I am Harbinger, I am Death”

Says the man dressed in black

“I am Lucifer, I am Beelzebub”

His voice is booming over the sea

*

My ship is small

The wind threatens to overthrow me

I hide in the cabin

And pray for steady waters

*

“I am Amon, I am Balaam”

The man dressed in black sits on my stern

“I am Shiva, I am behemoth”

“You will surely die this day”

*

I do not know my fate

Birds

In flight alone a bird is not free

Nor in sweet mellow song does it find liberty

It’s love and it’s love that bring the bird peace

Its love and it’s love that makes the heart beat

Presence

If dancers were wild could we capture their soul

Tie ropes ’round ankles and put them on display

Would they still have the heart to move like the wind

Or would they simply lose spirit and fade away

Could we steal a kiss from two lovers at night

And store it in a bottle made of sapphire and gold

Would it still hold the passion of the lovers embrace

Or would it crumble and die when we took off the lid

Human expression is not something to handle

To fondle and ravage like a toy or a doll

We are what we are and that’s what makes us unique

So be present when love comes knocking on your door

Mental Illness

The sounds I am hearing are not from this world

And the thoughts I am having are painfully grim

No graceful words can describe a delusion

No insight can be formed in poetic expression

Because it is the most simple and raw form of human emotion

That keeps me awake all through this night

The doctor said it may pass or it won’t

Only time and perseverance will tell

So I write poems pleading for the Lord’s gentle love

Embarrassing myself in front of strangers I’ll never meet

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Oh Lord, I am waiting

For the sweep of your hand

WereWolf

How softly do you trot on the pads of your feet?

Do you muffle your panting with the last victims flesh?

I was mildly content and comfortable in my home

Until you snarled at me from the edge of the yard

Now I scour the documents that explain your being

And try to find rest when I am afraid