Bad night

God be with me and stay with me

Keep me company through this trial

The evildoer threatens me

Even enticing me with poetic words

He is so close that he nearly invades my prayer

Keep my words simple and true

Let me talk to you with my heart

And only through your own love

Give my words power

I have not spoken out loud to you

In a very long time

But tonight I am so afraid

That I called upon you with my mouth

Keep me safe and sane

Oh God I am so afraid

Be with me

Please forgive me

I have brought evil on myself

And allowed it to enter my home

My breathing is shallow

And my chest hurts

My head is thumping

And my limbs are weak

Oh Lord stay with me

Please do not leave my side

Use your power to protect me

Listen to my prayer

I never left completely

Oh god why I am so afraid

To tap into the breathing of my lungs

And see that they are not functional

 

When I shy from you

I do not understand it

Why can’t I pray?

 

Where does my heart go

What has blackened my vision

So that all I sense is fear

 

Lord although I need you

Still I am anxious

To be free in my expression

 

Release me from this cell

Comfort my aches

So that I may be whole

Say Love

The things I cannot mold with my hands

Cause a sorrow of heart and of mind

If only, if only, if only…

Is all that drags on in my head

And so we carry on through pain

In worry for your mother

Stuck in the cold grip of fear

Our heads spinning from lack of control

Though your emotions are well hidden

Still I sense the corners of your hurting

Suffocation, drowning

Strapped in, with no power to move

So much anger at how unfair this is

So afraid of what it all means

How are the memories so far off now

Why can’t we live the way we did before

I wish I had answers to give you

I wish, I wish, I wish…

But here we are staring

At the hard face of life

Who’s stern indifference tears at our chest

And eats our passion to live

This is not where we give in

Nor do we turn away

My words will not change time

They are only the expression of my heart

And perhaps they will have an emptiness

That does not satisfy your need for more

So let me hold you instead

And don’t let go until you are ready

Pray First

Say Love, Say Love, Say Love

Velvet

Slick legs make my heart pump blood

Until I’m throbbing

Craving your velvet

The shape of you on my tongue

Mesmerized by your lust

Your body heated and magnetized

Drawing lines from your nipples to your core

Until your sex is pulsing, greedy

Pulling me in

So that I may ravage your wetness

And thrash with you for hours

Time is an illusion

On nights when we sweat and scream

Castle

I’m building the foundations for my castle

With stones that I carved from experience

Some are tainted with blood

Other’s are blessed by holy water

The Devil waits on the outskirts

Offering his hand when I am overburdened

I do not lie when I say that sometimes I accept

And when I do my mind wanders into dark forests

That are full of wolves and snakes of no earthly presence